What do men want? Isn't that the general topic discussed by all of the fairer sex throughout the world? Yes indeed it is. But very few or actually none of us land up with the most apt answer (mind you, there is NO correct answer).
And your problems soar up even more when you have more than one man in your life (even the 'just friends' men come in this category). If one wants freedom and space, the other demands you to be all over him. If one accepts that he is very possessive of you and you dont like it coz you dont have your independence, the other doesnt talk about possessiveness and you still dont like it as you dont get the attention that you demand. Huh...!! At 23 are things still so complex? Or do we just make them complex to suit us?
23 - the number hits me in the face. I have never felt the surge in growth so much as I did when I completed 23. I suddenly was more mature, more calm and patient, more tolerant, more responsible, more of a monotonous person, more of a person who likes routine. In short, I became OLD.
Anyways trying not to drift from the main topic of conversation and maintaining the continuity - I have always been more comfortable with men (then guys; at 23 I have started calling them men). I have always had more male friends than female. The reasons could be diverse. Either coz I couldn't gel well with the jabbery lot or coz I had something to offer to the other lot (no double meaning intended here ;-) ). So coming back to the point - I gel well with men. I know their psyche. But do I?? I claim to understand them, I claim to have been in close proximity to them for the past 7 years and have observed them closely. But each time I meet a brand new guy, I falter somewhere or the other. My experience and my research always loses to the new something that the new guy has to offer.
At 23, life has taken a full circle and I am again where I was 23 years back. Everything is new to me, everything is a challenge to me, I yet have a lot of ground to prove myself. The only 2 differences being i) that I have forgotten to smile and ii) I don't cry as loudly as I did 23 years back.
Realisation :
As I try to end this post (on a positive note-in sync with my earlier post Happiness), I realise that it is not worth the effort trying to do a Phd in andrology. I actually never have, but I used to put myself in the category of people who are neither andromaniacal nor are they misandrist. But I wonder if that category even exists. Being one half of the most intelligent race on the face of the earth, I would like to believe that they are just fine.
And as far as living life at 23 is concerned, well I must remind myself that its 23 and not 40.
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