A Letter to a Friend

To You,

I derive happiness from small things in life. That being said, bigger things in life leave me spellbound and I dont know how to react. I start doubting their enormity. Something similar happened to me a couple of days back when I heard the news that I had been willing to hear for over 4 months now. I was successful at last. But I didnt know if I was happy. I was so well prepared for the worst that I had almost started living the alternate life. To give my reaction a direction, my only critic didnt seem happy either. I decided to not be overwhelmed. And I continued with my preset agenda for the night (which indeed got a push as a result of the sucessful news). I was with friend log, people who dont know me well and who I dont intend to make a part of my successes and failures, and so it was the perfect setting. I was far away from being reminded of anything that I didnt want to think of.

And in all this I forgot that there are people who care for me, people who are willing to be a part of my life, people who deserve to be a part of my life. Its their right and I am no one to decide. Not everything about your life is governed by you. Id say most of it is not. I want to say 'I am Sorry'. I am so so sorry. You have been more than a friend to me. I did say those nasty things about you being selfish et all...well.. I still stand by them ;) , but you still have given to me that which no one could - hope, faith and confidence. I am not those who forget and are long gone. You should know that about me by now. There is not one thing that I have forgotten - Tulips, Pure, Oh Man, Hint, Empire, Eggs etc etc. No one forgets. Priorities change, relationships dont.

It wasnt my success that got to me, but my inability to celebrate that did. I couldnt have done that without you. I have always complained and I didnt even realise when it became inevitable for me to move ahead without you. I am so glad you are there and would not lose you for anything in this world. I love you.

From
Me